Hellboy (2019) Movie Review/Rant by Luke Nukem

Luke Nukem's review is a video on his channel.

It needs to be casted into Hell (and here's why)

 * 1) Luke himself is already an awful critic, and for so many reasons. "Critic" is just not in him, but yet he forces it in, and it fails...badly.
 * 2) Luke is an irate Hellboy fan himself, and it's proven constantly.
 * 3) * The video begins with him mocking all because he said that it's not as bad as what everyone says, and his response was him using a clip of Hellboy saying "Uh, are you serious?" Even worse, the first comment of the video literally says "Chris Stuckmann as a whole is a joke. I don't even bother with him," and he hearted the comment.
 * 4) * He called the original films "underrated," which is far, far, FAR from the truth. Sure, they may not get as much attention as movies from Marvel or DC, but they do stand as some of the greatest superhero films ever made, as well as some of the best that del Toro has ever directed. Hellboy himself also has a massive fanbase, so if anything, these movies are pretty much overrated. He also spent a few minutes just praising the hell out of the films and trashing Lionsgate and Neil Marshall (note: it wasn't his fault for the failure of this movie) like they had killed his mother, showing more proof of him being an idiotic fan.
 * 5) * He asked for a Hellboy III, something Guillermero himself confirmed won't happen.
 * 6) * When a fan of the reboot actually defended this movie, tshogallik, he responded to him, once again, treating the original movie like a gift from God and ended it by saying "this felt like a Hellboy movie made by people who hate Hellboy" which is not true since Mike Mignola (the creator of Hellboy) was part of it.
 * 7) * The reboot ended up getting a 0/5, all because it's not the originals and everything about it is not like the originals, which is a very pathetic reason.
 * 8) * Clearly, he doesn't like David Harbour as Hellboy because it's not Ron Perlman, but he covers it up as "it sucks because he's generic" which makes no sense.
 * 9) * Later on, when 2019 was over, he did a list of his worst films of 2019. And of course, Hellboy was number one, all for the same reasons.
 * 10) Just like all the other reviews he did, he tries to be edgy, using heavy metal music as background music and dark, gloomy looking backgrounds. Another thing is that he constantly acts when he speaks, which is even worse.
 * 11) Every time he speaks, as well, he constantly makes the SJW face (no, he's not a SJW, but still) and it's really cringy to look at.
 * 12) He can't even make up his mind. He starts trashing Neil Marshall for ruining Hellboy but yet at the near end, he begins praising him all because he directed movies like The Descent and Dog Soilders which he considers it "underrated" and "the greatest horror movies ever made." What!? Seriously, he just said he hates him for ruining Hellboy and now he's his favorite director?
 * 13) He also compares this movie to other movies that have nothing to do with anything but not the originals. Yep. And guess what? He even compares it to  and, mainly because the CGI in the reboot is worse than two. If he even seen those movies is a mystery, because those 2 had some awful CGI and possibly worse than the reboot.
 * 14) He doesn't talk about the secondary characters (Alice, Ben Daimio, Professor Broom, etc.) because he thinks nobody cares about them, but it's also that he doesn't know that Alice and Ben are secondary characters. That's not true, and tshogallik, the reboot fan, proved that!